


Before You Leave

by LeLx



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Hange is mom, Headcanon, Hurt/Comfort, Post canon, Spoilers for Anime fans, rivamika
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-29
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-07-25 19:31:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20031166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeLx/pseuds/LeLx
Summary: Spoilers for anime watchers.RivaMika fluff! Levi and Mikasa spend quality time together before an impending mission separates them.





	1. Chapter 1

The battle at Marley still weighed heavily in everyone's mind, Eren had gone rogue and Sasha has been killed. The morale amongst the Survey Corps was incredible low. Not long after returning back to Paradis, Mikasa made her way into the mess hall, now changed from her battle gear and cleaned up, back into her civilian attire of a white dress and covered herself with a shawl. She looked around the hall for her comrades, she waved as she spotted Armin sitting at a table across the room but was interrupted by a hand grabbing hers. 

“Hey…” Levi greeted her gently, letting go of her hand now he had his attention. 

“Levi, how did your meeting go?” She asked.

“I came to find you because I’m being called away now.” He looked away mournfully, “I'm escorting Zeke back to the city.” He said in a hushed tone, “I’m leaving this afternoon and I won’t be back for a while. I’m sorry I won’t be there for Braus’ funeral either.” 

“You won’t?” Mikasa looked panicked, gripping tighter onto the shawl that covered her shoulders. 

Levi felt a pain to his heart, “No. I’m so sorry. It’s been decided already, I have no choice.” 

“I, I, I need you to be there,” as tears welled up in the corners of her eyes, she quickly squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. “No I’m sorry I know you’d be there if you could.” 

Mikasa winced as she felt a lump in her throat and tried her best to hold back her tears. Levi quickly put his arms around her to comfort her, “Come to my room, please? I still have time.” He whispered into her ear. 

He saw Armin timidly approaching the pair in his peripheral vision, Levi nodded to him, giving him the okay to come over. 

“Mikasa, what’s wrong?” The blond asked, his voice panicked. 

The captain stepped away from Mikasa but kept a hand on the small of her back. “Armin, I’m leaving imminently,” he gave a heavy sigh, “you’ll stay by her side during Sasha’s send off won’t you?” 

“Of course.” Armin put a hand on his childhood friend’s shoulder, gripping it tightly. He understood through Levi’s desperate expression that he was pained to leave her, especially at a time like this, Eren was causing everyone grief through his actions in Marley. Armin understood the pain she was feeling seeing their friend change like that. 

“I’ll be here the whole time, okay, Mikasa? You won’t be alone as long as you want to be.” Armin said gently. 

Mikasa nodded, “Thank you.” 

“After you’re done, come find us upstairs okay? I’m meeting with Jean and Connie.” He added with a sympathetic smile. 

“I will.” 

Armin gave her shoulder a squeeze before he set off and then gave the couple a wave as Levi thanked him. The captain quickly turned his attention back to Mikasa as he felt her body trembling, she was obviously trying to hold back her tears and he responded by pulling her towards him. “You’ll be fine I know you will. Let’s go, come on, you can cry all you want when we get back to our room, okay?” He said in a harsh tone but Mikasa knew he meant well. 

“I’m sorry I don’t mean to.” She said quietly, letting him drag her down the hallway to what was originally his room but it seemed to be theirs now and surprisingly no one had given them shit for it. 

He closed the door to the room and made his way over to the bed where Mikasa was and sat beside her. He watched her with sorrowful eyes. 

Feeling herself begin to break down, she threw her head into her hands, “They think I’m conspiring with Eren. They all do, I heard them whispering earlier.” She sobbed, “I can’t bring myself to turn my back on him yet but I would never betray everyone like that!” 

Levi pulled her into his lap and she threw her arms around his neck, burying her face into his shoulder. He sighed heavily, wishing he could simply take her worries away from her even if that meant he felt every bit of her pain. 

“Listen to me, everyone knows you’re an excellent and loyal soldier, they’re just being assholes because they’re hurting right now.” Levi kissed the top of her head and patiently waited for her sobs to subside. 

She pulled her head from his shoulder to face him, Levi brushed her tears away with his thumb before leaning in to kiss her on the lips. 

“Don’t let them get to you, okay?” He demanded, putting his forehead up against hers. “Ignore those idiots.” 

“Okay.” She whispered, “how long do you have, Levi?” 

The captain grimaced as he glanced at the clock on the wall, “Twenty minutes.” 

“Let me help you get ready then...” she said standing up from his embrace and moved to the closet to collect his things for him. Levi stood up and joined her, taking the fresh uniform from her and began to get changed. She crouched down to grab his boots from the bottom shelf. 

“I’ll be honest, I'm glad to be getting away from that brat, Eren. I’ve always fought to protect him and now I feel like everything leading up to this point has just been a bad joke.” Levi frowned, as he buttoned up his shirt. He wanted to tell her to stay away from Eren, that he wasn’t the same kid they had once knew but Levi could tell Mikasa understood this already- otherwise she wouldn’t be so upset. 

“Trust me I feel the same way but he does care about us all, somewhere deep down inside...” The raven haired soldier passed him his boots and sat down on an armchair next to where Levi was finishing getting ready, she sighed as she flopped herself down.

“I don’t know about that, Mikasa but please… just let Hange deal with him for now.” Levi shot her a frown.

“Alright,” she agreed reluctantly, leaning back into the chair and crossing her arms. 

After he was done getting dressed, Levi crouched down in front Mikasa, he placed both hands on to her legs and gave them a gentle squeeze, “I’m sorry, I’m just worried about you that’s all,” he gave her a sad smile, “I just wish I wasn’t leaving right now.” 

Mikasa uncrossed her arms and put her hand over his, “I’ll be fine, I promise.” 

For a moment, Levi rested his head onto her lap, letting out a deep sigh as she began to stroke his hair. He felt truly blessed to have become this close to her, to be able to have these moments of comfort in this horrible world. 

“I don’t have long, come here.” He stood up and held his hand out to Mikasa, dragging her out of the chair and pulled her into his embrace, giving her a long gentle kiss. “Let me walk you over to the others before I go.”

“Don’t you want me to come see you off?” She asked as he gave her a hard kiss to her cheek. 

“No, I’ll be escorting Zeke, I don’t want you seeing him again, just take the rest of the night to relax okay? Be with your friends.” Levi brushed a loose strand of hair from her face and smiled sadly, the truth was he couldn’t bare the thought of her standing there watching him leave. Not knowing if he’d come back or not. Not knowing when the next time they’d see each other again. His only comfort was that he knew she would be safe with Armin. 

“I will.” They kissed repeatedly on the lips, until they both reluctantly agreed it was time to go. “I love you, Levi.”

“I love you too,” he muttered, giving her one last kiss.

“Don’t you dare die.” She pointed a finger at him, playfully ordering him with a smile.

He returned the smile, “Same goes for you too,” Levi gently pinched her cheek and shook her face, “Now stop being a softy you’re going to throw me off my mission.” 

“Heh?” She giggled, “You’re the softy, old man, not me!” 

Levi blushed and pinched her cheek a little harder, “Don’t smile cutely at me like that, that’s even worse!” 

Mikasa laughed and pushed him away, “Let go you weirdo!” 

“Only when you stop giggling like a schoolgirl!” He couldn’t resist tickling her, being so carefree like this was another thing he enjoyed about being close to someone again. 

“Stop you stupid idiot!” She begged through giggles, finding herself flopping onto the bed, unable to stand anymore. 

Levi climbed on top of her, not relenting, he grinned knowing he was torturing her. “Idiot?! You’re the one laughing like one!” 

“Stop! Please stop!” She begged.

Levi relented his torture, weary of possibly getting kicked across the room if he didn’t stop. “Alright, I’ll stop.” He tapped her on the nose, “Now you be good while I’m gone.” 

“Yes, Captain.” Mikasa said with a glint in her eye, grabbing his shirt by its collar, knowing that would get her in even more trouble. 

“You are the worst, you know that?”

“Yes I do,” she grinned, pulling him a little closer.

Levi couldn’t resist and leaned himself down and began to kiss her. He rolled on his side and dragged her with him, holding her tightly and never wanting to let go. The kiss picked up speed and became deeper and more passionate. Feeling himself get carried away, Levi broke the kiss and leaned up onto his elbow, stroking her face as he did so. 

Mikasa smiled, trying not to let her sadness show, she knew it was time for him to leave. “Ready to go?” 

Levi felt a pang to his chest as she looked up at him, “Come on, I'll walk you over now.”

The pair got off the bed, Mikasa made her way to the door and waited for him as he threw on his green cloak. He nodded to her and they left the room making their way down the hall to where Armin waited for her. 

Armin stood up from the couch as he heard their footsteps approach, he went to greet them but refrained as he saw Levi pull Mikasa in close. 

“I’ll miss you.” He whispered, giving her hand a squeeze. 

Mikasa felt herself well up but fought her tears for him. “I’ll miss you too.” 

Levi pulled away as he saw Armin in the doorway. “See you soon.”

“Goodbye, Captain.” Armin said cheerfully then glanced to Mikasa to gauge her reaction. 

“Goodbye.” She added and watched him as he turned the corner of the hallway. Mikasa bit her lip, trying to hold back her tears. 

Unable to hold himself back, Armin threw his arms around her, he hated seeing her so upset. “I’m sorry, Mikasa.” 

She gladly accepted his hug and cried into his shoulder, “First Eren, then Sasha, now this!” 

“I know...” Armin felt a tear slip down his cheek. “I’m here too, okay? We’ve got each other’s backs, even if Eren doesn’t have ours right now, we’ve still got each other!” 

Mikasa pulled away and smiled at her friend, “You’re right. Thank you, Armin.” 

“Let’s go and wait for the others,” Armin lead her into a living room. 

Jean entered the living room, followed by Connie, a bottle of whiskey in hand. 

“You guys ready to give Sasha a send off tonight? Hange gave me this.” Connie said waving the bottle in his hand. 

Mikasa and Armin nodded, the four of them took a seat on the sofa. Jean took the bottle from Connie and began pouring out glasses for everyone. 

“I just saw Levi, he looked pissed.” Jean said, glancing to Mikasa. “Did you break up with him now Eren’s back?”

Mikasa frowned, “No, of course not.” 

“Good.” Jean muttered, “Then what was he so mad about?” 

“He’s escorting Zeke back to the city.” Armin decided to speak on behalf of Mikasa, wanting to dispel the tension between Jean and Mikasa. 

“I see...” Jean sighed, “Well I don’t blame him then, that guy gives me the creeps.” He added handing out the glasses of whiskey among his friends.

“No more politics or Titan talk tonight, okay?” Armin said as he raised his glass. 

Jean raised his glass and smiled, “Agreed. To Sasha!”

Mikasa and Connie raised their glasses too and the four took a sip. Most of them pulled a face as the whiskey went down their throats. 

“That was foul.” Armin winced. 

Connie took another long sip and shivered as he did so, “It is but let’s get drunk anyway. Hange has given us this for a reason.”

Jean slapped Connie on the back, “That’s right! We have to do this!”

Mikasa laughed, “Lets go easy, I’m not carrying you guys to bed again.” She pulled her knees to her chest, still holding onto her glass. “Except Connie, he’s allowed.” 

The shaved head soldier smiled at Mikasa, comforted by her kindness. “You hear that Jean? Mikasa said I can get wasted! Now let’s down another!” 

Jean poured another round, “Ready, on 3?” He looked at each of his friends and they nodded with courage. “1, 2... 3!”

Another round of groans and splutters came as they finished their glasses. As the evening went on, their faces became rosier and they relaxed a bit more. The whiskey went down easier too. 

“You kids enjoying yourselves?” Hange dropped in, holding a few plates of food. 

“Commander!” Jean stood up to take the plates from her. “Would you like to join us?”

“No, no!” She waved her hand, “Unfortunately I have work to do but don’t let me stop you guys. Now line your stomachs!” 

The soldiers thanked their commander as she left the room. Jean began to unwrap the food and Mikasa approached him, helping him prepare the plates of deli meats and bread. 

“Mikasa...” Jean began but avoided eye contact with her, he focused his attention on the food. “Don’t throw everything away now Eren’s back. He doesn’t deserve your loyalty.” 

She frowned, “You already said that earlier.” 

“I know but I want to make sure you really hear it. Take off that scarf too, do you really think Levi likes you wearing that?” Jean furrowed his brows at the her. 

Mikasa stopped in her tracks, it felt like her heart had skipped a beat for a moment and the cutlery she was holding slipped from her hand onto the floor. 

Armin rushed over from his place on the sofa and stood between the two, “Jean, don’t be an asshole. This evening was supposed to be about Sasha not Eren.” 

Mikasa crossed her arms, “How could you say that?” 

“Look, everything was a lot easier before he came back.” Jean bowed his head. “And plus you and the captain are good together, I don’t want anything spoiling that.” 

“You know she loves him, Jean. They’ve been together for years now nothing is going to change that.” Armin frowned. “We’ve all seen them together, what they have is unquestionable.” 

“You’re right…” Jean bowed his head down, “I’m sorry, Mikasa. I’m just worried you’re not seeing the Eren we’re all seeing.”

“I see it okay?” Mikasa said as she wrapped her shawl tighter around her body.

Jean raised an eyebrow, “You do?” 

“Don’t take me for an idiot, Jean. I begged him to stop today but he wouldn’t listen.” She sighed, too exhausted to get worked up about this all again. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realise.” Jean put a hand on her shoulder, “I’m sorry, okay?”

“Alright.” She nodded, “Let’s go be with Connie now, he needs us.” 

The soldier they spoke off was slumped into his armchair, fast asleep, his whiskey still in hand. Jean moved to take it from him and placed it back on the table. 

“Should we take him to bed?” Armin asked.

“No!” Connie suddenly let out, his eyes still closed. “I’m awake. Stay here.” 

“Alright buddy, don’t worry we’re staying.” Jean sat by him, patting him on the shoulder. 

The three smiled at each other and began to eat, sticking by their friend in his time of need. They chatted away, reminiscing about their friend Sasha. 

As the night came to a close, Jean pulled Connie up out of his chair, throwing his arm around him, “Come on dude, bed time!” 

They said their goodbyes and Armin walked Mikasa back to her and Levi’s room. “I’ll come get you for breakfast tomorrow okay?” He gave a smile.

“Thank Armin, don’t worry about me okay? You don’t have to babysit me just because Levi asked you to.” She said a little sheepishly, hating herself for putting her friend out. 

“No… Mikasa…” Armin looked down, “With everything that’s been going on with Eren, I... need you too.” 

She gave him a big smile, “good, then let’s stick together.”

“Awesome, see you tomorrow then.” He waved and set off to pass out in his room, which he shared with Jean and Connie. Mikasa originally shared her own room with Sasha but their own rendezvous with the men in their lives meant they didn’t share it as much, which now Mikasa regretted. Sascha had frequently brought home Niccolo to their room and they seemed to have made themselves quite comfortable there too. 

She made her way into Levi’s room, getting changed into her night wear, putting one of Levi’s discarded cotton tops for comfort. It still smelled like him, she was glad. Mikasa slipped herself under the sheets and sighed, a tear slipped down her cheek as she laid her down on Levi’s pillow. Tears for Sasha, for Levi and for Eren. 

-


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is now post canon thanks to the Ackerman separation in the manga which is still unresolved! Oof, I hope you guys like it. 
> 
> Disclaimers: Sponsored by all the kdrama I’ve been watching. More angst then fluff. This fic is going in direction I didn’t expect!

Mikasa and Armin were riding their horses hard and fast through the forest, heading for Historia’s farm. Word had spread that Levi and Hange were there and Jean had sent them recover Commander Hange. Armin was desperate to stay with Eren but Jean has said they needed Armin and Hange to strategize in safety before returning to the walls.

As they entered the farms land, they began to slow their pace, Armin gave a quick glance over to his friend, she had been almost silent the entire journey and now she seemed to be very uncomfortable riding her horse.

“Mikasa, are you okay?” He called over to her.

She nodded, “I’m fine, Armin, how about you? I know you wanted to stay with Eren.” The Officer deflected the question confidently.

Armin furrowed his brows as he noticed Mikasa shift restlessly, as if her stomach was hurting her, “Are you in pain? What’s wrong?”

Mikasa suddenly stopped her horse and doubled over, “shit!”

The blonde gasped and pulled his horse over, jumping off to give her a hand as she stumbled to the ground to vomit. “Oh jeez! Mikasa! Are you alright?! That’s the third time now! Are you sure you didn’t hit your head during the battle?” His voice was panicked but he sprang into action putting an arm around his friend and held back her hair from her face.

She wiped her mouth, seemingly finished emptying the contents of her stomach and sighed, “I’m sorry, Armin.”

“Don’t apologise! What happened?!” He said handing her a flask of water.

“I guess I’m just worried…” Mikasa took a long gulp before continuing, “do you think Levi’s really dead?” She kept her stare down at the ground, worried that if she met Armin’s gaze it would break her.

“I don’t think that’s necessarily true… Think about it, Mikasa… If he was really dead I don’t think the Commander would have ran off with his body like that. It just doesn’t make sense.” He said thoughtfully, rubbing his friends back.

The raven haired soldier remained silent but nodded her head slowly.

“Come on, we’re here now, let’s go.” He pulled her up by her hand, “everything’s going to be okay.” He smiled warmly at her, though truthfully he had no idea what they would discover at the farmhouse but Armin wanted to be strong for Mikasa. Just like she’d been strong for him.

-

Commander Hange jumped out of her skin when she heard the sound of horses approaching the property, she peeked out the window and breathed a sigh of relief to see it was Armin and Mikasa. She flew out of the farm house to greet them outside as they stopped and climbed off their horses.

“Oh my god! Mikasa! Armin!” Hange cried out, tears escaping her eyes, “how the hell did you find us?! Does anyone know your here?”

“No, commander, we’re alone! Jean sent us to find you!” Armin told her, accepting Hange’s embrace, he was grouped into her arms along with Mikasa.

“I’ve been so worried about you all! My babies!” She wept into their arms.

“Commander,” Mikasa pulled away from her, “what about Levi?”

Hange gasped then shook her head to regain her composure, “he’s alive. Historia’s doctor is with him now.” She suddenly grabbed Mikasa by the hand and led her into the farmhouse. “Mikasa, I have to warn you he’s in very bad shape, he blew himself and Zeke up with thunder spears, by accident.”

The raven haired officer stopped in her tracks, “so it’s true then…”

“Normally I wouldn’t think it would be a good idea to interrupt while the doctor is in there but… I think it’ll do him a great deal of good to see you.”

Mikasa felt a lump in her throat as she processed the news but nodded.

Armin followed the two women inside, “Historia has a doctor here?”

“She’s just had her baby, so I’m guessing since she’s the queen and all she gets everything her and the baby needs.” Hange shrugged, “honestly we haven’t been here long, I have no idea… Mikasa let’s go in.”

The trio made their way into the farmhouse and stormed passed Historia’s people that flinched at the presence of more soldiers. Hange led them down a narrow corridor until they stopped at a door, “He’s in here.”

The commander stepped aside for Mikasa to go enter first and she took in a deep breath before slowly opening the door, not wanting to burst in and afraid of what she might see. Her trembling hand rose to cover her mouth, aghast at the bloody mess in the bed before her.

Sensing Mikasa’s dread, Hange acted quickly and hugged Mikasa from behind, her grip was tight and held her back from running in. Mikasa gasped, as she heard Levi groaning from the bed across the room and she fought to break herself free of Hange’s grip.

“Listen,” Hange whispered into her ear, “Listen to me… Mikasa, Levi needs you to be calm right now. You have to be strong for him.”

The officer squeezed her eyes shut tight, releasing tears to run down her cheeks. Hange’s embrace was strong but very comforting to the officer, Mikasa had never been more grateful to have her commander at her side then now.

“You have to be strong,” Hange repeated, “do you think you can do that?”

Mikasa nodded, letting out a small sob as she did so.

“Alright, sweetie, in you go.” Hange said as let go of Mikasa but to Hange’s surprise she felt Mikasa take her by the hand, bringing her over to the bedside with her.

Mikasa let go of her commanders’ hand and knelt next to Levi’s bedside. Her trembling hand reached over to his head and stroked his bangs away from his blood stained face. “Levi? Levi?” She let out another high pitched sob as she felt Hange put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

They watched as his face twisted with pain as the doctor continued to work on him. His eyes remained closed.

“Levi!” Hange called out to him in a loud voice, “Mikasa is here!”

The Captain’s eyes flew open, “Mikasa?” His eyes darted around to find her.

She gasped and leaned over him, stroking his head at a faster pace, “Levi! I’m here, I’m here.” 

“I’m sorry” he groaned, reaching his hand up to touch hers.

His body seemed to relax as the doctor stood and moved away from the bed, as he announced that Levi would be fine the rooms’ atmosphere immediately lifted. The doctor sighed and began to walk out with a large tray of bloodied shrapnel that he had pulled from Levi’s body. Hange followed the doctor out of the room leaving Mikasa and Levi alone.

Mikasa wiped her tears with the back of her jacket sleeve, “don’t apologise, you’re going to be okay, that’s all that matters.”

“I’m so glad you’re here.” Levi finally opened his eyes and looked up at her, “I must look like hell, you look terrified.”

“No, no!” She shook her head and put on a big smile to reassure him, “I was just looking at your face… you’ve got a really cool scar on your face now!” 

“Don’t smile like that, it’s even worse than that terrible lie you just tried to feed me!” He smiled and stroked her cheek.

“No it is, it’s really cool!” Mikasa began to laugh despite herself but tears continued to come. She was relieved to see his sense of humour was still in tact.

“Are you laughing or crying?”

“I don’t know!” She said grabbing onto his hand and buried her face into it, giving into her emotions and sobbed, “Levi, we heard you were dead! I thought you were really dead!”

“Well I’m not, alright?” He said, his voice was gentle and full of warmth, “be careful of my hand it’s covered in blood.”

“I don’t care about that!”

“I do, I feel disgusting.” He sighed and closed his eyes from a moment.

Mikasa studied him, it seemed he had been rushed to be treated so quickly that there hadn’t been time to clean him up yet. She threw off her uniform jacket and rolled up the sleeves of her shirt. “Alright, I’ll try and wash you okay? I don’t know how good a job I can do with all the stitches and wounds but I’ll try.”

“Thanks.” He said a look of relief washed over his face. “You can kiss me, you know.”

“I was afraid I’d hurt you.” Her expression softened and she carefully sat down on his bed.

“Who cares, I never thought I’d see you again.” He ran his hand up her forearm, gently stroking it with his finger tips.

She bit her lip, trying to keep a hold of herself but her eyes still filled up with tears, “you mean when you set that trap?”

Mikasa’s words stung him hard, he was already in unbearable pain but this is what hurt him the most. “Mikasa…” 

“I’m sorry, forget I said that.” She put on a smile, “I’ll be back in a minute,” she then stood up from his side to locate a bowl, water and some towels.

“I’m sorry, I don't think I can stay awake anymore. Don’t leave,” he pleaded, shifting restlessly in his bed.

“Don’t worry, you should sleep, I'll be right back, okay?” She leaned over and kissed his forehead, he only groaned in response, his eyes already closed.

\- 

Mikasa ran out of the house, she fell to her knees on to the grass and burst into tears. She hated herself for offloading on to him in his vulnerable state but she couldn’t quite believe what a mess he had gotten himself into.

She gasped as she felt Hange’s arms around her again, “it’s alright, I’ve got you. It was quite a shock wasn’t it?”

The raven haired soldier nodded but could only respond in high pitched sobs.

“Are you angry with him? Is that why you’re so upset?” Hange asked, feeling herself well up too.

“I’m sorry I don’t want to be!” Mikasa cried into her commanders chest, dampening her shirt.

“I know but he did what he thought was right at the time, all his comrades turned to titans, he was left alone with Zeke…” Hange sighed, “this whole thing is a complete shit show honestly, he’s lucky to be alive.”

“I know,” she sniffed, “I’m so glad you found him.”

“Me too.” Hange sighed and squeezed her tightly, “stay strong, okay? Remember? He needs you.”

“Thank you, commander.” Mikasa pulled away, “I will.” She smiled as Hange gestured a fight pose with her fist.

-

After she had composed herself, Mikasa returned with two large bowls of warm water and some washcloths, she pulled up a chair next to Levi’s side and began washing away the blood stains from his hands.

Levi looked over to her and smiled for a moment but he soon fell back to sleep. Soon his hands and arms were clean, she moved to his face, avoiding the many wounds caused by shrapnel that had once been lodged into his skin. She gave a heavy sigh as she wrung out the wash cloth and used just one finger to gently brush the dirt and blood away from his skin. A lump formed in her throat again but she stifled it.

There wasn’t much more she could do until she could wash his hair too but at least for now he was clean and she hoped this made him more comfortable.

-

By early evening time, Mikasa had kept herself busy while he slept, she had cleaned him up, washed his uniform or what was salvageable from it and pushed the bed next to his a little bit closer so she could stay with him.

“Levi?” She called out to him, “Wake up, I’ve got some toast for you.” She frowned as he didn’t stir, he was still in a deep sleep. The doctor wanted him to try and eat but perhaps he needed the rest.

Mikasa sat down on the bed next to his, she had pushed it right up against his. She pulled off her socks and sat cross legged, staring at him, resting her chin on her hand.

It was then Levi began to stir, his eyes met hers and she flinched in surprise. He gestured for her to come closer, “Mikasa, come here.” 

She smiled and laid down next to him, leaning on her elbow, “Are you hungry?”

Levi frowned, “I don’t know, maybe..” he looked exhausted.

Mikasa leaned over the bed and brought the plate to him, “look I’ve made you some toast.”

“Thank you.”

She jumped as he grabbed onto her arm suddenly, “what you said earlier… you were right. I’m sorry.”

“What do you mean?” Mikasa looked at him puzzled.

“When I made that trap I wasn’t thinking. I was totally overwhelmed, it was just me and that creepy bastard and I lost control of the situation. I’m sorry.” He stroked her cheek, tracing her scar.

Mikasa shook her head, “no I’m sorry, I was just upset earlier. I know you did what was best.”

Levi then opened his arm out, “Come.” He gestured for her to lie against him.

“Won't it hurt you?!” She looked panicked.

“Do as I say, come on.”

“Alright.” Mikasa beamed, slowly leaning onto his arm and laying her head on his pillow. She felt herself melt as he wrapped his arms around her.

“See?” He kissed her firmly on the head. “I’m not going to break.”

“I’ll break _ you _ for nearly dying!” She said, nuzzling her face into his neck.

“Is that right?” He chuckled.

“Yep!” She playfully tapped his head with her fist, “Pow.”

As she went in for another playful punch, Levi caught her fist and pulled her into a kiss. He slowly kissed each lip carefully, wanting to savour every moment before their mouths opened and deepened the kiss. Mikasa felt tears run down her cheek once more, Levi kissed her lips firmly then pulled away.

“Hey…” he said gently, “quit that crying will you?”

She gave him a bittersweet smile, “I’m sorry, it’s been a long month.” Mikasa sat herself up and pulled her knees to her chest.

“What do you mean? What’s been happening?” He furrowed his brows but his voice brightened, it was obvious he was desperate to find out what he had missed.

Mikasa ignored him, “Come on sit up and eat something.”

“Alright at least tell me what’s been going on with you.” He tugged at the back of her shirt.

“Explosions, betrayal and even prison.” Mikasa sighed, “please, Levi I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

Levi studied her, she was wringing her hands nervously and avoiding his gaze.

“Alright pass me that toast then...” He grumbled and let Mikasa help him up, she fixed his pillows for him so he would be comfortable and helped him lay back. She grabbed the plate and handed him a slice. Levi did as he was told and ate.

-

During the night Levi awoke, the pain had returned. He grimaced as he knew he’d need to ask Mikasa for help getting his pain relief but felt reluctant as she was fast asleep next to him. He felt a knot in his stomach, she didn’t look as peaceful as she usually did when she slept. Her face was a little puffy from all the tears she shed that day. He hated himself that he was the cause.

There just was something not quite right about her, he thought. Of course she had every right to be upset but… there was a sorrowful look in eyes he wasn’t used to seeing. Unfortunately no one would tell him what was going on in the walls, he was completely clueless. Armin would probably tell him, he thought. Levi spotted a glass bottle on his bedside table with a spoon next to it. He breathed a sigh of relief when he realised it was his pain relief, there would be no need to wake Mikasa.

-

The next morning, Levi awoke to the sound of shuffling around, the sun was bright through the windows and it took a few moments to adjust his eyes. He slowly sat up and spotted Mikasa sitting at his bedside in a chair, rocking a fair haired baby in her arms.

“Why do you have a baby? How long have I been asleep?” He grumbled and rubbed his eyes.

“Very funny.” She smiled, “It’s Historia’s daughter.”

“Oh wow, that poor kid.” Levi joked again but couldn’t help smiling at the newborn’s presence.

Mikasa looked down and gently stroked a finger over the baby’s cheek, “I thought it might cheer you up.”

“Why’s that?” He sat himself up with a groan.

“I don’t know,” she smiled down at the baby. “New life and all that. You wanna hold her?”

“Sure.”

Mikasa stood up and carefully passed the baby over.

“Jeez, she’s a tiny thing… She can’t be more than a couple of weeks old.” He observed as he adjusted his arms, bringing the baby’s face close to his. Mikasa leaned over Levi and continued to stroke the baby’s face, their eyes met and they smiled at each other.

“See you look better already,” she said to her captain.

The pair jumped as a gasp interrupted the moment. It was Historia, “you two look so good with a baby!” She ran over to hug Mikasa, “I’m so happy to see you!” Historia exclaimed.

“Thank you for helping Levi.” Mikasa said as she hugged her back.

“I’m just glad Hange thought to bring him here and we weren’t too far away!” She looked to Levi, “Damn Captain you are really pulling off that Dad look, have you guys ever thought about having kids?”

Mikasa and Levi looked awkwardly at each other before she pointed to Levi, “he does.”

“Captain?! You do?!!” Historia couldn’t help but giggle.

“I’ve always wanted children, although for purely selfish reasons... Just so I can raise them to be loved. Not like the way I was brought up.” Levi said, looking down at the newborn in his arms.

“Come on Mikasa give him one!” She grinned and poked her friend.

The raven haired soldier silently gasped, “Eh?” She quickly put on a smile, “I’ll be right back, I better grab you some breakfast.”

Historia’s face dropped as she watched Mikasa leave the room. “Did I say something wrong?”

“Don’t worry, it’s not you.” Levi sighed, “she’s been acting strange since she got here…”

“Because of the accident?” She said, looking to Levi with a sad expression on her face.

“I’m not sure,” he glanced up at Historia, “but I intend to find out.”

—

  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Chapter 3

The day had passed quickly by, Mikasa had kept herself busy, which meant trying her best to avoid Levi’s suspicious eyes. She would dash in and out of his room and tried to distract him every time he looked like he was about to ask her to talk to him. Luckily for her, Armin kept Levi busy this evening, he had volunteered to completely debrief Levi on the Yeagerist uprising and the battle going on in the walls.

She took the opportunity to sit outside on the farmhouse’s front porch, making herself comfortable on a bench, which sat against the exterior wall of the house. Mikasa spent her time reading, enjoying the time she had to herself. The officer jumped when she heard the front door swing open.

“Oi!”

Mikasa turned around to see Levi hobbling out of the front door. “Levi! What are you doing out of bed?!” She went to stand up from her seat on the bench but stopped when she saw Levi raise a hand to her.

“I’ll be fine, sit down,” he said with a groan as he slowly walked over.

“Are you sure?” She cringed watching him, “it’s painful to watch you, you know.”

“My _apologies_,” he shot back sarcastically, flopping himself onto the bench next to her. Mikasa was surprised to see he had actually managed to dress himself, albeit his shirt which wasn’t tucked in and fell messily around the pair of suspenders he had on. He also had no shoes or socks on but he was dressed nonetheless. Mikasa was still in uniform herself, her trousers were rolled up to her knees and she had her shirt unbuttoned down to her midriff, which exposed a black undergarment underneath. “What are you doing out here in the dark?”

“Just getting some fresh air.” She sat up a bit and crossed her legs onto the bench, “how are you feeling?”

“Not too bad considering…” he gave the officer sideways glance, eyeing her carefully to gage her mood.

Mikasa caught him off guard with a sweet smile, “What?”

“What?!” He nearly jumped out of his skin, blushing a little.

“You’re staring,” Mikasa chuckled and shoved him gently with her shoulder.

“What’s wrong with staring?” Levi nudged her back. “Maybe I missed you.”

“I missed you too... and your grumpy face.” She leaned in for a kiss, jokingly pouting and closing her eyes tight.

Levi put his palm over her mouth and pushed her away gently, “Oi! Quit acting so cute now, especially since you’ve been acting off with me since you got here.”

“Eh? Me?” Mikasa blinked, trying to play innocent, “I’ve just been worried about you that’s all…”

Levi rolled his eyes, “What is it that you aren’t you telling me? Please just spit it out. You’ve made me drag myself all the way outside after you!” He poked her cheek, “you should feel guilty about that, you know.”

When Mikasa didn’t respond he placed a firm hand on her shoulder, “Mikasa.”

She sighed and looked into his eyes, knowing he was serious and no amount of flirting would distract him. “Levi…” Mikasa took in a deep breath and looked away, “You don’t want to know. It’ll just hurt you. It’ll hurt to know.”

“Okay…” Levi ran a hand over his face, unable to hide his frustration, “I’m sure I’ll be able to manage, Mikasa. Just tell me.”

He watched as Mikasa pulled her knees to her chest, suspecting she was preparing herself to spit out what was bothering her. Her hands trembled as she gripped onto the fabric of her trousers.

Mikasa finally looked up at him, her eyes filled with tears, “I’m pregnant. Or I was, I don’t know.”

“What do you mean?” He asked carefully, swallowing down a lump in his throat, “did you miss your period?”

“Yes, several.” She nodded, “it wasn’t just that, it’s been a while host of symptoms too…” she unconsciously put one hand to her tender chest, “The sickness has been awful.”

Levi took in a deep breath, “Armin did mention that you puked all the way here...”

Mikasa frowned, “Hey, why were you guys talking about me?”

“That doesn’t matter,” he quickly interjected and took her by the hand, “tell me when did this all start?”

“It’s been three months now, here… feel.” She put her legs down and took his hand down to her lower stomach, leading it under her trouser waistline so it rested on top of her underwear. He smiled as he felt a small firm lump.

“Holy shit, Mikasa...” He gripped his fingers around the bump and lingered on it for a moment before slipping his hand back from under her clothes.

The raven haired soldier gasped as Levi surprised her by bringing her into a playful headlock, “You idiot! Why would that hurt me?!” He exclaimed, giving her several hard kisses on her cheek.

“Stop that!” Mikasa couldn’t help but giggle. He loosened his grip so he was cradling her head in his arms, she looked up at him and he leaned down to kiss her on the lips.

She sighed and took another deep breath, reaching up to stroke his face, “Levi… I don’t know if the baby is okay or not.”

“Oh?” His face dropped and he shifted to allow her to sit up again.

“Last week, Armin and I were caught in a terror attack at base, there was an explosion.”

“Yes, he told me.” Levi quickly added, frowning, waiting for her to finish.

“I had some bleeding after that,” her voice cracked, tears escaped her eyes and she turned to face Levi, “I only had a brief chance to go to the infirmary before we were under siege! I’m sorry!”

Without a second thought, Levi pulled her into his arms, the embrace was almost suffocating for Mikasa but it was something she had been desperately craving for weeks, she broke down and began to cry into Levi’s chest. “I’m sorry, Levi! It’s all my fault!”

“Mikasa,” he shook her in his arms, “how could it be your fault?! Did you set that bomb?!”

She continued to sob, “No but-”

“Don’t feel guilty about things you can’t control, it’ll just eat you up inside. It’s no good for you, especially in your condition.” He gently scolded her.

“Alright, alright...” Mikasa sniffed, her sobs subsiding.

Levi gave her a firm kiss on the head, “Mikasa, why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

Mikasa wiped her tears away with both hands, trying to regain some composure, “I wasn’t sure until you were already gone, I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologising.” He stroked her hair away from her face, “Tell me, are you still bleeding?”

“No and it wasn’t much but…” She sighed, “the doctor at the infirmary said all I could do was wait and see.”

“I see.” He kept her close in his embrace, rubbing her shoulder with purpose,“Mikasa, regardless of what happens to this child, our child, you don’t have to carry this burden on your own any longer, I’m here now, okay?”

“Barely!” she laughed, pointing to his wounds and stitches, “look at you!”

“You’ll never let me forget this will you?” Levi crossed his arms, “I survived didn’t I? That’s what counts right?”

“No!” Mikasa exclaimed and playfully put her hands around his neck, pretending to strangle him. Levi couldn’t help but smile and pulled her into another kiss.

“I love you very much, Captain Levi…” she whispered in between kisses.

“And I love you too, trouble maker.”

They kissed again, lingering on each other’s lips, “I feel a lot better, thank you.” Mikasa said, kissing him again.

Levi wanted to let go and enjoy being swept up in the romance but his mind began to race with thoughts about his unborn child, “Mikasa?” He uttered softly, kissing her one last time.

“Mm?” She replied dreamily, slowly opening her eyes.

“When will we know if everything’s okay?”

Mikasa sighed and leant her forehead against his, “Not until someone can hear a heartbeat or when I start to feel the baby move.”

“When will that be?” He asked, he seemed impatient.

“In a month or so.” She smiled apologetically, putting her arms around his neck.

He frowned, “that’s a hell of a wait.”

“Tell me about it.” She said, “the last week has been torture.”

“You’ve really thrown me through a loop, I thought all this was about Eren… Armin told me about what he said to you. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Mikasa bit her lip, “Well, I suppose so much has happened I didn't know where to start…”

“I see.” He muttered, turning his gaze to the night sky, “Armin explained all about that Ackerman bullshit.”

“What do you think of it? Do you think I’m just a mindless sheep because of our Titan science blood?” She asked with a heavy sigh, the memory of her confrontation with Eren at Niccolo’s restaurant still stung.

“Who the hell even cares, don’t let what he said get into your head… I have to admit, part of me hopes it’s all part of another hairbrained scheme of his but… he hasn’t been himself since he left for Marley.” He said beginning to get angry before he did a double take of Mikasa, “Wait a second, where’s that scarf?”

“Don’t know. I left it in the stockades.” Mikasa answered flatly, giving the distinct impression she didn’t want to talk about it.

“Fine, I won’t ask.” He ruffled her hair playfully and in response, she batted him away giggling.

They sat back on the bench for a while, watching the night sky and listening to the crickets chirping in the background. It was a world away from the chaos that was currently ensuing in the walls.

The sound of Historia’s baby crying from inside the farmhouse shook them out of their silence.

Levi let his hand fall back to her hidden bump, “Have you told anyone about the baby?”

“No.” She replied flatly, watching his hand grip onto her stomach beneath her unbuttoned trousers.

“That’s stupid.” He tutted.

“Maybe…” Mikasa exhaled a deep breath, “But there might not be any point.”

“Enough of that now. I’m sure everything’s fine. You were still being sick today weren’t you? That’s gotta be a good sign…”

“That’s what the doctor said too.” Mikasa smiled, still watching Levi pulse his fingertips on her stomach. “You’re starting to look pale, Levi, you should get back to bed.”

“Alright.” He reluctantly removed his hand and stood up with a groan, “say, you don’t look like you’ve put on weight.”

Mikasa followed him into the farmhouse, “Really? My trousers feel tight…”

Levi turned his head back to smirk at her, “is that why your trousers have been unbuttoned since you got here?”

“Yeah… I’ve been tying them together with string.” she said sounding a little defeated, “but you can’t notice with the ODM gear on top.”

“You can wear mine if you like.” He teased.

“As if they’d fit…” she shoved him, smirking back, “go to bed, stupid.”

-


End file.
